May we cry out to God and seek Him even more. I don’t intend to answer everyone’s questions. There are just some things we will never understand. But, ultimately, we can trust in Him.
Here you will find some resources and information to help Dealing with Loss.
“Sometimes life is incomprehensible. Haley Hodge, 17, succumbed to head trauma caused by a fall on Saturday evening. Many of us cried out to God on her behalf, and many of us continue to cry out to God for help in this mess. That’s what children do, that’s what we do, we don’t hold back and we cry out to God. There’s no words or simple formulas that will do. As David says in Psalm 77 “I am so troubled that I cannot speak”. Rather than seeking to comprehend God, remember His faithfulness and His character that He has revealed to you over and over and to us all when he entered into the mess himself over two thousand years ago promising to be with us always. Haley believed this and He’s with her too even in this. He has conquered death and in His victory those who are His have victory also.”
“This is not an easy perspective, but this is what the Hodges are leaning on. “If a mother is mourning not for what she has lost but for what her dead child has lost, it is a comfort to believe that the child has not lost the end for which it was created. And it is a comfort to believe that she herself, in losing her chief or only natural happiness, has not lost a greater thing, that she may still hope to ‘glorify God and enjoy Him forever.’ A comfort to the God-aimed, eternal spirit within her. “
Tim and Chris Hodge on the loss of their daughter:
“Monday was our worst day, but Haley’s best.”
This is a short article I wrote facing the tragic loss of a wonderful, loving, 17 year-old in our church.
EXCERPT FROM AN ARTICLE ON GRIEVING THE LOSS OF A LOVED ONE:
“Then I went into therapy and I realized that, two years later, I hadn’t grieved my father’s death nearly enough. Two years of grieving, even if you’re not trying to turn it off most of the time, is NOTHING, when it comes to a parent or a spouse or anyone you’ve lived with for a big part of your life…
After my dad’s death, I felt more anguished AND I felt more alive than I’d ever felt in my life. I felt more grateful than ever. I only wanted honest people in my life, people who could talk about heaviness and melancholy and really savor it instead of feeling uncomfortable. I don’t think I stuck to that. I think I couldn’t handle staying in that space for very long, because it made me feel too raw. So I retreated.
Don’t retreat. You need to find people who will talk about this. Figure out who they are. You’re in therapy now. If your therapist isn’t helping you deal with this that well, then get a new therapist. Or find a grief counselor, too. Or find a therapy group for people mourning a big loss. Look hard at your friends and figure out which ones you can lean on a little more. Someone out there can handle it, I’m sure of that. You just have to figure out who it is.
And you need to write things down. Every day. It’ll help you to understand what shape your pain takes, so it doesn’t take you by surprise, so you can talk yourself out of feeling paralyzed by it.
You also need to exercise every day. Mourning and exercise go very well together. You’re already in a lot of pain. What’s a little more? Fatigue can feel pretty redemptive when you’re sad. Because mourning is about being alive.” ~ Polly
- When God Doesn’t Give A Reason
- “Fruitcake And Ice Cream” by Louie Giglio
I saw this message (really a story) live in Birmingham. The beginning lays the foundation for the story that starts (at 26:30) with a girl from University of Florida. It is a story of hope, redemption, grace and motivation to be there for others.
Below is a video of stories of hope in the midst of pain:
NFL player dealing with addiction; an illusionist with cancer and a young woman who experienced the death of a cousin. They talk about their fears and the hope they found through Christ.