#1 Reason NOT to “GIVE” Your Child/Teen A Smartphone For Christmas

I know how much joy you would get from giving your teen the latest and greatest smartphone. Or even one that’s not the newest model, but one that you can at least read the screen. (I didn’t know cell phone glass could crack into so many pieces! My daughter’s screen is barely readable!)

The joy on their faces would be so satisfying if you were to hand them that new device. They would adore you forever. Well…at least until the next time you told them to clean their room.

Here is why we don’t GIVE them a phone. We buy the phone and let them use it. We make it clear it is OUR phone. Yes, there is a difference.

It may feel like it’s theirs, but make it known from the beginning that it is yours and therefore it can be taken away at any time for any reason. You can ask to see it. You can go through it. When they spend too much time on it or you sense there are issues, you have the right to take it away for a while. (Um…Aren’t you paying for the service, anyways?)

Since it is your phone and they are borrowing it and because it is a privilege (It’s not an American right), you can use it as leverage. “Not doing well in school?” No more cell phone. “Disrespectful?” Gone. “Didn’t do your chores?” Say good-bye.

There are dangers that come with these devices which means there is added responsibility. Please check out this post about protecting your loved ones: TWO SETTINGS TO KEEP THE DARK SIDE OUT.

For those of you who are new to having a child with a cell phone (or tablet), you may want to look at this agreement (edit it as you see fit). This is the best way to start giving them this new responsibility. Click here for more info on hosting our Parenting Techies Workshop.

For those of you who have already made that purchase and planned to put it under the tree, wait until all the gifts are unwrapped and explain to them that they have a “loaner” phone. Trust me, they will be just as excited.

Have a wonderful Christmas!

Helping You Have Homes Devoted!
Jonathan & Carrie

Written by Jonathan

Rev. Jonathan Cronkhite has been serving youth and families for the last 28 years. With the heart of a pastor, he encourages and equips families to have Homes Devoted, through conferences, workshops, coaching, and writing. Married to Carrie for 25 years, they have 5 children, three of whom are young adults. Jonathan enjoys working alongside and discipling his teenage sons and their friends, renovating and flipping homes. He supports Carrie as she leads a home school co-op, and together they practice hospitality and serve in the community.