Dad,
You have your to-do list. Things that just have to get done: pay bills, yard work, fix the leak under the sink. You go from your job-do-list TO your honey-do-list. But, the first 10 minutes after you arrive home might just be the most important.
#1 Get Mom. (10+ Minutes) Run through the fanfare of praise coming from those young ones beckoning your attention and find mom. Give her a hug and a kiss. Ask her about her day. If your kids are like mine and still meet you in the driveway before you even get out of the car, give them a hug and then find mommy. This action demonstrates to your children (and to your wife) that she is first. So many moms and dads put their children first. Sorry to break the news to you, but this isn’t healthy for your marriage or theirs. You took vows to…one. You will spend your life with… one. You are one with…one.
The most important thing you can give your kids is a good marriage.
How will your boys treat their wife? Typically, the way they saw it modeled for them for 18 years. Your daughters? They will most probably marry a man that will treat her the same way you treated their mom.
I talked with a wise friend of mine today, Bill Burch. He told me he left a note to his wife every day he went to work…every day for 40 years!!! That is a man that cherishes his wife!
It is frightening how much our actions impact our children. Of course, it also means our modeling can leave a great legacy.
With so many marriages falling by the wayside leaving a wake of destruction, we need to do something different. It starts with us. Malachi 2:15 asks, “But did He not make them one, having a remnant of the Spirit? And why one? He seeks godly offspring.” (NKJV)
God knows a battle scar of a bad marriage and ultimate divorce is that it makes it so much harder for our children to experience a loving God. Their wounds last a lifetime. It is harder for them to trust and receive trust. The hurt caused by some fathers is devastating. The list goes on and on.
When I was a child, I experienced my parents arguing a lot which led to their divorce. When Carrie and I first got married, guess what I thought every time Carrie and I had a dispute?
God desires godly marriages and knows the greatest impact is on our children.
Dad, copy the underlined sentences below and print them. Put one on your desk. Tape one to your steering wheel, laptop, mirror…wherever you will see them to be reminded. I will do the same.
Blessings,
Jonathan
The most important thing you can give your kids is a good marriage.
It is frightening how much our actions impact our children. Of course, it also means our modeling can leave a great legacy.
God desires godly marriages and knows the greatest impact is on our children.
Written by Jonathan
Rev. Jonathan Cronkhite has been serving youth and families in full time
ministry for the last 23 years. With the heart of a pastor, he encourages and equips families to have Homes Devoted, through conferences, workshops, coaching and writing. Married to Carrie for 22 years, they have 5 children, run a home school co-op, drama club and invite 50 people over once a month for airsoft battles.
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